Don’t wanna go to work tomorrow

I guess most of us are wishing we could stay home and write – or stay home and goof off. It’s 2240 and I’m binge watching The Office. My dog is lying here in front of the fire. I took a test tonight and passed with 95%. I would like to sit here in complete relaxation for at least two more hours…but the alarm clock will go off at 0540. The biggest yuck factor is that I work the next 3 days. For those that work 5 days a week that sounds so…. nice, right? Nah, I work 12 hour shifts at a hospital that is a 30 minute drive from the house. I am gone from 0600 to 2000, and usually spend at least one day off after a 3-in-a-row shift block sleeping. I know very few nurses that do not do the same. Bah. I need more money somehow. Let me go stick another 500 words onto my

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Criticism

By golly, my ego has taken such a blast from this unseen professor who resides somewhere in this world. I have no idea from where she comes, where she goes, nor have I known any of her writings other than the assignments listed on the college website. I have never gotten such negative feedback on any of my writing – ever. I am 50/50 over this feedback. Half of it is helpful and the other half – does she smoke crack? Push on. Push on. All I could think of tonight as I was driving, was that one day, one day I will be a published author. Hopefully in multiples. And why on earth do I put so much store in what ONE person thinks? Won’t I get plenty of negative feedback in the form of publisher rejections and reader reviews? This is just my baby step.

Perfectionism

Is not a good quality to have as a long-distance learner. I am quite frustrated by the lack of live help when I require it. Therefore, it takes me two weeks to revise a two page paper – it is too hard to say all I need to say in 500 words! If I get dinged on APA format, then it takes me twice as long to make sure my APA references are spot on. If my introductory sentence is too dull, my next introductory sentence must be fantastic! Even so, the APA method is so labyrinth like in its detailed, nonsensical rules that I am sure I have made several mistakes. If I fail this revised attempt, should I stop writing? Or go back to my soul-mate, Joaquin Miller, who wrote this poem: For Those Who Fail by Joaquin Miller “All honor to him, who shall win the fight,”The world has cried for a thousand years,But to him who tries

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Something I thought was neat

First off, this is about a death, so if it bothers you, don’t read. As a nurse, I see a lot of death, some peaceful, some horrifying. This is a story about a peaceful one. There was a patient that died recently, a restless soul that was not doing well due to multiple medical issues. That person’s gentle partner decided to change our care in the ICU to “comfort care”, which means we no longer attempt everything we can do to fix the problem (which can be very costly, invasive, and yes, many times cruel). Comfort care is keeping the patient clean, dry, warm, and to the best of our ability, free from pain and anxiety. This latter part is not always achievable, but we do try. This particular patient had had a rough prior week before coming our ICU, and we all did our very best to make things right. The gentle partner voiced appreciation for how considerate we

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Germophobe at the state fair

This is probably the number one hardest day of the year for me. I am a germophobe and I admit it. Let me tell you all how much I know about you. As a nurse, I see things. Gross things. I see people pick their noses, pick the crud from their nails, and don’t wash their hands after using the restroom. I see the surprised look on people’s faces in the hospital when I hand them a soapy cloth after they use a bedside commode and suggest they wash their hands. 9 times out of 10 they use that cloth to wipe their face instead. I am handed grimy cell phones with thick films over the earpiece and asked to speak with the family member on the other end. I see the underwear that is worn. Ohhhh, don’t get me started on the underwear! Remember how your mama always told you to put on clean underwear before leaving the house?

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Pearls before swine

Not that what I have to say is by any means a pearl. Or that the people I speak to are swine. But I need to learn to keep my mouth shut. The things I say seem to be making their rounds out of context and turned into things that are ugly. You see, I have a problem. I am a single mom that works out of town in the critical care unit 7a-7p. When I am not at work I devote all my time to my children, because they are all teenagers now and there isn’t much time left before they go off into the world on their own adventures! And of course, there is the BSN coursework that I have saddled myself with. So, when I get to work, there are adults there, adults my age! The majority of my co-workers are within 5 years of my age and I am just so thrilled that to be speaking

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Writing

My ego is quite large I suppose, for I have always fancied myself as a great writer. I haven’t always kept up with it and yet, I find myself returning again and again to the written word. I remember 11th grade Advanced English class all too well. We had a student teacher that year, and she was excited and gung ho over teaching us. We had been analyzing “The Devil and Daniel Webster” by Steven Vincent Benét, and we were to write an essay inspired by this story. I was sheer excited! I had been writing my own little love stories and whatnots in an old notebook, but this, this- unlimited creative outlet wherein I would get some feedback! I couldn’t wait. Home I went, and got to work on my story. Mine was a Christian tale of soul vs. hell, and I was thrilled to share my new faith AND write a fictional tale that interwove the two. I

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